What pious little puppets we are, dancing to this god, this church.

What pious little marionettes we are, singing in off-key choirs, praising to a greedy god whose existence remains disputed.

What pious little blind men we are, giving and giving till we have nothing left on our backs, to an organisation that guilt-trips us -- Jesus died for you you know, God sent his only son down to as a sacrifice for your unworthy white ass, so shouldn't you give everything you are to him? Yes, now give everything, your virginity if necessary to procreate sons like the daughters of Lot. A god who loves you unconditionally, who cares for your wellbeing requires this of you, even if you have to bed over backwards to the point that your spine threatens to slice through your ribcage like a striped orange, halved.

They call it faith for a reason. Blind faith. Faith in something so motherfucking unreliable. Yeah, I bet those churchgoers who attended church every sunday didn't expect to have get involved in a car accident right outside the church-- where gos is supposedly protecting all of them.

Where is this god, I ask you? Where? In this bible, ravings by madmen? These outdated, sexist and inhumane ravings some of us stick to so ardently, like it is their life?

I call that an unhealthy obsession.

Every sunday I have to attend this one hour of drudgery, wasting my TIME, my YOUTH and EFFORT/HOURS AWAKE in a god I don't believe in. Free will? HA. The slaves in To Kill A Mockingbird had more free will, I bet. "You go to church and get confirmed or you're out of this house!"

And what happens if you decide to stay home and study because one hour of your precious time is taken up? Oh, suddenly you become the equal of Mas Selamat, a philanderer, a unfilial serpent to your parent's breast! You don't want to spend time with your family! You can very well study during the March holidays! You go online doing unproductive things the whole day, instead of studying!

Peace be with you! What a useless, hypocritical sentiment! Just because I don't want to be another of you motherfucken religious zealots (probably puritans who regard sex as a necessary evil) you have to drag my parents and their parenting techniques into it! And you're a pastor!

What is it with pastors who constantly put their foot in their holier-than-thou mouths?

Another reason why I hate the church as a community: while some of them are understanding, nice people who don't aggressively push their religion like credit-card dealers or the auntie at the neighbourhood salon who tells you to buy her super expensive shampoo, the rest are assholes who think that as long as you don't believe in God, even if you're as kindly as Saint Theresa, it's a one-way ticket to hell.

Besides, Saint Theresa isn't as pure as you think she is. She had a wet dream about the archangel, for goodness' sake. Yeah, the whole bullwash about fiery spears...they're just pretty platitude for sexual fantasies.

Get down to reality, people! You're human. You're the same as us disgusting creatures who tread the same earth as you do, not believing in God. You have the same desires and dreams and ambitions and your nature is the same. Deny that, and you're simply trying to live in an idealistic world.

And you know what happens to people who try to create their own utopia?

War, death and sickness. Bloodshed of children and women and brave men. Torture. Just look at communism and other political systems that try to establish a 'right' to the 'wrong' they see. Look at the jihad. Look at the crusades. So, you think god is so important huh, to the point of just finding a scapegoat to express your superiority? Welcome to the Al-qaeda! You'll fit right in...except that you'll have to believe in the extremist Islam faith.

When the apocalypse comes, God ain't gonna protect you. The church is an architectural building by humans you know? Even with this so-called sanctity, itll come crashing down on you're holier-than-thou mouths.

And I'll be the one laughing through blood, through the piles of rubble as you cry for a god that isn't there.

Church is a supreme waste of my time, time I cannot afford to lose, especially since I don't believe in their pompous rituals of the God. I won't claim I have experience over their heartstring-tugging journey of rediscovering faith. I just don't feel it.

SO shut up and let me study.

I have a headache, I told her, bringing my bird-bone hands to try wipe away my sleepless-stained eyes, despite my mental note 15 seconds ago not to do it 'cos it will make the rings worse. Darker. And then I'll be a perfect ambassador of PandaPeopleUnited.

Don't know if there's such a group out there, but hey, there should be one. I'll join in a quater of a heartbeat.

Persevere, she says, as she swings the door shut. Smartass. I wanted to finger her--

Wait, that came out wrong.

I wanted to point my middle finger at her. Much better. I do not want to think about sex and m little sister together. EWWW EPIC NO I SHOULDN'T HAVE WRITTEN THAT DOWN OKAY PHYSICS OHM'S LAW.

But shit, I'm tired from facebooking even though I SHOULD be studying (yes clicking a mouse takes substantial effort and brain power. I am a zombie!), emo-ing over my degenerating writing to lift up the blessed digit.

Fact of life: younger siblings are forever annoying.

The impulse to listen to BBC in order to strengthen my English pronunciation paid off.

Lookie at this gem:

One of Pope Benedict's ceremonial ushers and a member of an elite choir in St Peter's Basilica have been implicated in a gay prostitution ring, in the latest sexual scandal to taint the Vatican.

Read more: http://www.city-data.com/forum/politics-other-controversies/912534-vatican-staffer-implicated-gay-prostitution-ring.html#ixzz0hJ6esyE6

I went wut, then LOL'd.

OOHLALA SCANDALOUS~~~

What a farce. All these pious people. Heh. I bet that usher was the most God and Jesus and Thou-shalt-not person his friends and kin knew, but he still engaged in this promotion of...deviant practices.

Please note that I wholly support homosexuals if they love each other very much (that's the idealist talking), but I'm speaking within the usage of Christian English.

Statues don't talk. Apparitions that look like Jesus or Mary or my mom regularly appear in sandwiches, all you need is a spoon to shape the burnt area and a healthy amount of imagination.

If Jesus was real, he'll be rolling about in his tomb, except that he's supposedly ressurected, so I guess he's dissolving in a mist of self-pity.

Then again, the Vatican never really had a history filled with beautiful, chaste virgins and kindly sages. The original text used to be in the original languages of Latin and Greek? It was gradually translated to other languages at that time, particularly Latin, the 'scholars' language'. From regular CHinese-English translations we know that the translations can never substitute the meaning of the original text. But that's not my point. My point was that the bibles were translated into Latin Vulgate,"The Latin had become so corrupt that it no longer even preserved the message of the Gospel… yet the Church still threatened to kill anyone who read the scripture in any language other than Latin… though Latin was not an original language of the scriptures."This was because only the priests were educated to understand Latin, and this gave the church ultimate power… a power to rule without question… a power to deceive… a power to extort money from the masses. Nobody could question their “Biblical” teachings, because few people other than priests could read Latin. The church capitalized on this forced-ignorance through the 1,000 year period from 400 AD to 1,400 AD knows as the “Dark and Middle Ages”.

The church taught the ignorant masses, “As soon as the coin in the coffer rings, the troubled soul from Purgatory springs!” Pope Leo the Tenth showed his true feelings when he said, “The fable of Christ has been quite profitable to us!”

Isn't this so holy and benevolent, so full of good deeds? This sacred institution where the weak are protected! Ooh delicious irony.

Okay, this gives me three names to choose from for my religious name. Hitler, Adolf or Leo the tenth. Okay, maybe without 'the tenth'.

I wonder how the catechists would responbd. Probably try to deny this ever happened or brush it off, saying the past is the past and then moving on to glorify that arse in the sky.

Whatever. I'll rather do something more productive, like counting the number of hairs I have on my head.