For once I am ever so glad I said an expletive in public. Even if it was an offhand, 'fuck you'. Ok, the exact words were 'FU'.
And the following rebuke happily managed to open my much closed and tied-down mind to the wonderful realm of reflection and the silent updating of data sheets regarding the analysis of human beings in my mind. Somehow the talk turned from the use of language to interpretation, perceptions, the effect of reality vs. the fictional worlds, figurative use of language and the multiple uses of the word 'fuck'(no twisted thinking here, I meant as a container of emotions), to the art of words to create a story, to human nature and finally leading me to my conclusion that humans are innately selfish.
Yes, I know it's a lot to process, but it's natural to expect such. Humans are complicated creatures after all. You cannot, just by reading an excerpt of their blogs or a clip from their speech determine their exact character. It's shifting, ever-changing and evolutionary.
Just because I'm a girl I can't use coarse language? What makes coarse language course, anyway? Certainly not the words itself. Think about it: a word by itself has no meaning, but used in a certain context it opens up to a wonderful world of colours and flavours. Wo gave a word its meaning from the scrabled alphabets? Humans, of course. What prompted its arrival? Humans. What gave words it 'positive' and 'negative' aspects? Now here I cannot say 'humans', rather I'd say it's society: A group of humans somehow getting to the top and letting us follow them blindly like sheep. And what makes us follow them like sheep? Other humans of course. And why do we follow others?
Well I suppose this reasoning can go on and on into a nice 5000-word essay (possibly more) on human psychology. But the study on human psychology is still incomplete, there is much we still don't know and the many mysteries left unlocked. We cannot but emotions to words, we can simply link them up to imagery or metaphors. Yet, even a good Shakespearean piece cannot convey to even the best Literary critic that even wandered this Earth what exactly, at the point of time, the writer is trying to say.
Ok, cut the crap, you think. I shall. What I have been saying for the past few paragraphs, if you have been paying any attention at all (which I very much doubt), is that we humans interpret things differently, to our own advantages. Hence, we are selfish most of the time as we don't really think about others. You doubt that? Okay, let's put it this way: if doing good deeds were not encouraged from young and picture books you read as a child (inclusive of fairytales, mind you) all depicted cruelty and war against a certain nation/race, would you actually help a person from that race? Of course not. If doing good deeds were seen as bad, no kiddie will do it. Period. And this goes on to show the power of society on our views. That's why it took so long for America to shake off its bias against blacks. On a lighter side, it has been successful, which is why President Obama is standing there merrily giving speeches and inspiring hope instead of bloodlust and murder. (And obama fans, I am NOT lambasting Obama. I choose not to indulge in politics right now).
What do you think is the most repeated pronoun in telephone conversations? That's right, 'I'. I. I. I. A possessive pronoun, determining your self-importance and worth. Every human wants to feel important.
You doubt me? I dare you to see in this entry how many 'I's are repeated. That's right I am a selfish person to, but I know it and admit it, and that's why I detest humankind, simply because I recognise these negative qualities in myself and abhor myself for it. But as the saying goes, it's easier to place the blame on something else. I choose to place the blame on society instead of myself.
Tomorrow I shall start an experiment. My hypothesis: our views are governed by societal expectations (e.g. the values parents and teachers ingrain in ourselves). The sujects for my experiment will be those around me, includin my friends and family. No harm will be produced, I promise, save the possible servering of ties when you people accuse me of being inhumane.
I shall be exceedingly polite tomorrow and see what reactions I will produce. Of course, and I shall treat everyone like a '50s wife with no opinion of my own save theirs, which mean the world.
Tomorrow will be interesting.
