I wish I was born blind.

So what if I can't learn or remember? So what if I can't type? So what if I'll lose everything? So what if I can't study literature?

It is a pity that humans are such ignorant cowards, they need beauty to tell them the ugly side of things.

Art-- one of the faces of truth. The artist tries to render his opinion through his paintings. Everybrushstoke is crafted with a piece of him. Yet, because of depictions less than beautiful -corruped monks dipping into stashes of gold and silver instead ofbeing piour persons- cause them to burn effigies of one another.

Foolish.

Is our need for a sense of comfort, of security so great we even go to lengths to blind ourselves and lie that the world is still a beautiful one, where birds sing their song to welcome the dawn and flowers scent ladies' hair?

The beauty of this world? I don't see it. Sure, there are friendships and kinships, but they are so easily broken. The passing on of a person to an entirely different world can break it, like silk threads from a spiderweb.

I'd rather be born blind than to see this flagrant ignorance and the stubborness in people refusing to see the truth. I hate it, because I claim I am an artist, and am more emotional than the rest. I hate that I see thingd deeper than what ordinary people usually see.

Now when I see an old woman, stooped by the burdens of society and clad with shampoo and numerous chemicals used to maintain the monster she calls beauty, squinting her unequally sized eyes at me as she launches herself into a harangue, I no longer feel anger. Sure, there's irritation, but pity is such a powerful thing. Condescension is just a step away.

Because, my dear, though medicine has improveed since the medieval times, and you can now correct your eyesight by lasik, you can't undo it. Ever heard of these eyedrops which help prevent the worsening of myopia? You don't? You poor, overeducated person from local university.

Schools believe that they teach us all that is essential. However, they only teach us stuff society defines as 'important'. What about corruption? Arguments? Persuasion? Friendship?

They never really teach us stuff we really need to know.

Whenever I see an elder preaching himself when he got most of the basic facts wrong, I feel overwhelmingly annoyed. Why doesm't the old listen? DO they think it'a below them to listen to someone below their station? Hypocritical and ugly, you call this description. Well, in the Stone age, did men ever listen to their wives (or livestock for that matter)?

Yes, you are old, but does that give you a right to hold that over us? Yes, I am young, but does that give me a right to commit treason and other unreasonable acts? Why do old people get to lord it over us, yet the younger generation must remain submissive?

I hate this world, where age is NOT but a number. I hate this world, where it judges a person's sense, intelligence and capability by age. I hate this world, where it demands absolute respect for the elders, such that the younger ones can't even sit down on the bus when they are tired. I hate this world, for though the old suffer pains we don't know, they have long forgotten that their world then was vastly different from ours, where inflation was controlled and there was plenty of childhood games for all. I hate this world, where you have to remain competitive and even step on people's hand and feet (even your loved ones) just to survive.

You call this a society? I call this the behaviour of beasts.

See? We didn't really evolve much over the last milennia.

A hundred years of evolution and knowledge, and we are stabbed in the arse by our creations.

I wish I was born blind so I could be a coward, just like these people, and grumble all day about the rambunctiousness of teens and moan about my pains. I wish I couldn't see at all, because now I realise seeing things as they are is bad enough, seeing things not at a superficial level, but from a different perspective made it worse. There is completely no point in my ability.

I wish the world was born blind, for now even with eyes, they are still staring at darkness and unrecognisable shapes, trying to use their tempers and shortcomings to limit people.
------------------------

From young I was a faithful believer, reading the holy texts and praying every opportunity I got. I was proud of it. Ignorance was such bliss, until at the young age of 8 I tried to see things from an outsider's point of view. My intent? To try and 'guide' these 'lost' people.

I discovered a world of questions and no answers. I discovered violence and abuse. I discovered deeds and bias shown promeniently even in the texts.

I was disappointed.

From that day on, I am a Believer of circumstance, I am a backstabber, a greedy person with poor self esteem who only prays to get power.

I hate the person I've become.

I'll even go as far as to say I'd wish I never was born to this ungrateful and faceless world with millions of faces and not a single sincere smile.

P.S. I'm not gonna commit suicide. It's pointless, and I figure that the world can do without another dead body in the obituary and more grief. I figured the world can do without another survey, conducted out of shock, pondering about the suicidal nture of angsty teens.

Yes, you don't understand. For emotions are a tricky thing.

I'll tell you what made that problem seem so simple when you look back upon it: You're in a comfortable environment, safe from repurcussions and stress. Of course you'll think differently. It's the same as a rich man thinking about how simple the porblems faced by debtors were to solve. Their rise to power and monetary assets made them more confident.

Think about it.